Night
by siluestella
Summary: Set in the few months after the construction of the Berlin Wall. Ludwig has a bad dream with curtains of red. One-shot.


"See you around, Little Brother." With that, Gilbert straightened his face and turned around, following a bulky man to the other side of the red flowing curtain. Ludwig looked on as the sea of blood slowly transformed into a wall of iron. Suddenly, as if the lights had blinked out, Ludwig could see nothing but black.

As he came to his senses, he realized that it was all just a dream again. It wasn't the first time he'd seen the familiar silhouette disappear behind the red curtain. Many a times did he call after his brother in the dream, and many a times did he find it futile as he woke, only to find himself alone on his bed in the dead of the night. Each time he'd tell himself that it was just a dream. Yet, even so, it was difficult for him to get back to sleep again. Feeling restless, he would let his thoughts adrift as he sat on his bed.

The first and foremost thought he would have during these nights would be his brother. He missed his brother's mischievous grin. He missed how Gilbert used to ruffle his hair and laugh at the mess. He would smile to himself in the dark of the night, thinking about his brother's bad sleeping posture and then suddenly realize, that his brother was no longer in the bedroom beyond the door. He missed him. What separated them was no longer a door in these nights, but a wall built of iron. Yet deep down inside, he was certain it wasn't just the wall. It was definitely more than that.

Recalling the numerous quarrels he had had with his brother during the war, he remembered that it had occurred to him that he was right in doing what he did, but after his separation with Gilbert, he wasn't so sure anymore. The truth was, he believed that he had wronged his brother in a way that would take him more than forever to redeem himself.

"_You are losing track, you idiot!"_

"_I believe it is our best chance, brother," came the restrained retort._

_The angry man with ruby red eyes was silent while his younger brother did not bother to look up from his papers._

"_Mark my words, Ludwig. If you don't stop where you are supposed to, it will get ugly. I hope you know what you're doing," Gilbert finally said after a moment of tensed silence. And with that, he stormed out of the room, leaving a long echo of the banging of the door in the room._

Ludwig had realized the look on Gilbert's face during those times was not one of pure anger. Through the glimpse he stole at his brother exiting the room, he had found another emotion in those fiery eyes – disdain. Perhaps it was such exhibition of emotion that made Ludwig even deafer to his brother's warning, but it was undoubtedly a look that made Ludwig draw away from his brother with hurt.

After the failure in the first war, he had for the first time seen disappointment in his brother's eyes. And it was unbearable. Hence, he vowed that he would clear the doubt and pain in those eyes by fulfilling the expectations he had burdened since his existence. He was determined to become a nation his brother and people could be proud of at all costs. It was all that mattered to him then.

At first, everything he did to aid his boss was just as simple as regaining what he had lost in the war, and the contentment on his elder brother's face made him proud of himself. Yet, eventually, as obsessed to strength as he was, both he and his people's minds were brainwashed with glory and violence. What once started as a simple promise turned into a path that no one sane would dared to have taken. It was under such circumstances that the glee on Gilbert's face drained day after day, until it became too much for Ludwig to bear. The more he realized how much he had failed his brother, the more he pushed on for more power by exploiting others. It was the only thing he thought he could control properly, but even in that aspect, he had failed.

In the end, he forgot why he was standing where he was. He realized that he had awoken too late. And it seemed to him that Gilbert had already become someone too far out of his reach and their relationship far beyond repair.

Hence, when Gilbert smiled at him before being ushered into the other side of the curtain, he was taken aback. Yet, one look was enough to clear him of his doubts. Just like the frail rays of the morning sun seeping into his room, he was sure there was still a shimmer of hope in repairing what was broken. His brother's smile showed that he had not given up on him even though he had lost his way and failed him. There was forgiveness and understanding in those eyes that loosened the noose around his neck, the noose he had tightened around himself. And so, he knew, one day, he would be able to apologize. With the combined efforts of him and his brother, they might be able to tear down the wall between them and close the gap they should have closed long ago. So after the night, Ludwig would draw back the curtains and quietly say to the eastern sun, "Good morning, Brother."


End file.
